Monthly Archives: April 2013

Classic Southern Lemonade (Is there any other kind worth drinking?!)

Every summer for the past couple years my husband & I have turned into lemonade fanatics.  I guess we just got to craving it one year & found an awesome recipe & became obsessed with drinking it.  It was (/is) such a nice, refreshing change from soda during hot weather.

When I went to retrieve my super amazing recipe today *gasp* it was gone!  Considering how unorganized I am this is really no surprise.  And you’d think I’d have a mental back up handy but I’ve been blessed with the worst memory ever.  Luckily God (or maybe El Diablo) provided us with the internet & I’ve found a recipe that calls for the same ingredients but is prepared slightly different & offers a couple handy tips that I never knew (like rolling the lemons to loosen the juices…perfect sense, right??).  I’ve posted their recipe below & to avoid looking like a total internet recipe thief you can find the original site HERE.

Old Fashioned Classic Lemonade
Yield: 6 servings
Prep Time: 10 minutesCook Time: 10 minutesTotal Time: 20 minutes

I like to chill this in the refrigerator for a few hours or overnight before serving.

INGREDIENTS:
6 lemons – 1 cup of freshly squeezed lemon juice
6 cups water
1 cup sugar

DIRECTIONS:
Pressing down with your hand, roll the lemons back and forth on a hard surface to release their juices. Cut lemons in two and squeeze out juice reserving the lemon rinds and place the rinds in a large bowl. You can strain the juice if you like to remove the pulp, or leave the pulp if you prefer.

Boil 4 cups of water.

Place the sugar in a bowl and cover with 1 cup water and stir to dissolve.

Cover the lemon rinds with the other 3 cups of boiling water and let this sit for about an hour and you will have lemon infused water, discard the rinds.

In a large pitcher, combine the lemon juice, the dissolved sugar water, the 3 cups of lemon infused water and the remaining 2 cups of water.

Garnish with mint and lemon slices if you like.

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Their picture, used without permission but hopefully they won't mind since I'm promoting their recipe. 🙂

If you make it let me know what you think! As for me, I’m going lemon shopping tomorrow.

Pinterest post #3: DIY Dishwasher detergent

I was so excited to come across this pin & immediately added it to my list of “Pinterest stuff I want to actually do ASAP”, and made sure to get the ingredients-which happened to be required by a couple other pins I was trying.  I had just run out of Cascade (perfect timing) & I was super hopeful about this pin because dishwasher detergent is ridiculously expensive.  So I made a batch of the DIY exactly as it stated (very simple…all it takes is borax + washing soda, then some white vinegar when you actually run the dishwasher) & used it, exactly as it stated.

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-Insert drumroll here-
The dishes all came out amazingly, sparkling clean!  There was no particular scent other than clean-ness but I overlooked that (I’m a “smells” person…if it smells clean then I feel like it’s clean) because the dishes came out beautifully clean using a pennies-on-the-dollar mixture!  Here was my pros list:

•worked excellently
•ingredients were relatively cheap
•ingredients could multi-task for other pins
•very simple to make
•very quick to make
•would most likely have ingredients on hand to make more when I ran out as opposed to having to go to the store

The cons were:

•no awesome Gain-like smell

Happy as a clam I started using this DIY mix regularly.  Never once did I change my typical “dish habits”, even with the first run.  I will usually rinse really dirty dishes off under scalding hot water before putting them in the dishwasher; the rest just go straight in.  I don’t hand wash them then put them in or anything like that.  I kept an eye on my rinse agent level too because that’s where you put the vinegar.  Now, after a few weeks of using this mix, I’ve begun to notice there is always a film on my dishes when they’re finished.  I’m very displeased & disappointed with this latest development.  Is it some sort of build up from the borax and/or washing soda??  Should I be running some sort of cleaning cycle periodically??  I’ve tried troubleshooting this problem…I’ve made sure I filled the rinse agent with vinegar; I’ve added extra vinegar to the bottom; I’ve cut back the recommended amount (2 Tbsp) of mix; I’ve added a tiny bit more mix; I’ve rinsed the dishes off a little more than usual; I’ve run a second rinse cycle after the regular cycle.  Nothing is working.  No matter what I try I simply cannot bring back the glory I first experienced.

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It is not from food, or me being lazy & throwing in dishes with sandwiches & the like still on them.  It is a soap type residue.  If I take a damp towel or rag (which I’ve been having to do unless I want to hand wash every single dish) it buffs right off.  Maybe I need to “splurge” and get some actual rinse agent?  I guess I’d still be saving money on the detergent but it would be counteracted by having to purchase the $4-$5 rinse agent!

I’m not sure whether to classify this as a scam or not…I don’t know if it’s just my experience…it does work-in the beginning-so it’s technically not a scam.  You can find the original pin & instructions HERE, until I decide whether or not to move it to my Bullsnit Pinterest Scams board.  Go try it (borax & washing soda are each $3-$4 per box) and PLEASE share your results with me!!  This is obviously driving me nuts.

The joys of being a drunk 14 year old.

I’ve been inspired by juicy gossip a family mishap to post a blog on underage drinking.  Recently my niece (who blatantly cares nothing for me, or my immediate family, which as a side note is really sad because I truly enjoyed having a niece a few years ago-more family drama except on my husband’s side-and I miss having that in my life) was discovered to have some empty bottles of cheapo vodka hidden in what I’m sure she thought were strategic places in her room.  She also had a shot glass handily wrapped in her “delicates” drawer.

I’m not going to expand on all the different issues involved in this situation;  no, this post is designed more for the selfish reason of recording a few of my own teenage memories for the annals of history, just in case I ever become a smidgen as historically famous as Marie Antoinette (for instance) and the historians will need something to come back to and assist them with piecing together my daily life.  Hey, it could happen.

So my sister was telling me all the juicy details about this mishap (she is her step-mom by the way, so that compounds everything for both of them) & I started thinking later on about when I was this girl’s age (…the edge of seventeen) & actually earlier.  I had collected shot glasses & had them on display around my room.  I had 1 or 2 empty booze bottles just to round out the coolness factor, and a wine bottle with one of those drippy candles in it.  I hadn’t drank the alcoholic contents & I didn’t use the shot glasses.  Literally…decoration.
My room was decorated in this fashion for quite awhile, until I grew out of it. 

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See?? I still do display them.

Then I started remembering one of my ballsiest schemes ever.  You have to know that I was not a very rebellious kid…at all.  I’m the first born/oldest so I understood it was my duty to go to school, stay out of trouble, get good grades, be a good example for my younger sister.  But I guess every kid has a little bit of rebel in them, and mine was to concoct a fabulous plan where my friends, boyfriend and I skipped school & stayed home drinking Budweiser all day.  I know, I know but hellfire…I was 14!  This was exciting shit.  So I kicked it off by convincing my mom I was too terribly sick for school.  Win!  She let me stay home, no questions asked because I was such a cunty goody two shoes good kid.  Then I called my friend, who was with her older boyfriend (aka the beer buyer) & I’m fuzzy on the details now but after my mom left for work everyone was supposed to meet at my place.  (I can’t remember if the beer buyer was just going to blatantly park in the driveway or across the street at the little kids school…probably the driveway)

Everyone came & it was time for phase 2 of the great plan-no celebrating yet!  Next we all had to call the school for each other to excuse our absences;  beat the school at their own game…before they could call our parents to see where we were, we’d provide them the answer!  Very common practice for kids missing school.  I don’t remember who did what (beer guy of course didn’t need anyone to call for him; might I just point out how questionable I’m finding this person nowadays looking back, that he so easily went along with a bunch of 14 year olds?!) but I did call & pretend to be my boyfriend’s grandma (his mom wasn’t around; I realize now it would’ve been better to have creepy beer guy be his dad)…the school totally bought it!  We were home free!  Able to lounge in my room, sip our Buds like kings & queens, & relive our success; my bf had brought along his dorky friend who was making us all laugh.  I assured my friends that my trusty canine would bark at the slightest notion of someone pulling in the driveway or opening the front door.

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Yes, a whole book bag full. Leather book bag might I add.

So imagine the mild heart pounding heart attack I experienced when there was beating on my locked bedroom door.  Imagine the frozen looks of shock & bewilderment & “What the fucking hell do we do now?!” all over our faces.  Then chaos.  It didn’t sound like my mom but that was the only person it could be, right?  The dorky friend literally jumped into my closet & was peering out from between my clothes;  the rest of us started throwing the beers in a book bag then shoved them in the closet with him & closed the door.  Meanwhile my mom has started bellowing at me to open the G.D. door, so at least it confirmed it wasn’t an ax murderer who liked drunk teenagers.  Eventually I opened the door;  boy was she pissed.  White hot rage would best describe it.  She started threatening to throw creepy beer guy in jail so he hauled ass…I never…ever…saw him again.  My friend was a little sad but she ended up being a lesbian anyway so it probably didn’t matter much.  Then my mom announced to us that she would be taking us to school as we were.  Drunk.

On the way to school she revealed how it had all gone down: when I called as a grandmother, the nosy bitch office lady didn’t think the voice sounded old enough.  So she checked the absentee log & saw where my (real) mom had called in for me.  Apparently the school staff was stalking us because she then claimed she knew we were dating & thought something was fishy so she called my mom at work, filling her in on the whole thing.  Mom snuck home, didn’t shut her car door (she parked right outside my room by the way…I’m such a deaf idiot), & the dog betrayed me by greeting her when she came in, which I hadn’t considered, and therefore staying quiet.  So we get to the school & those ass clowns had called the cops!  To give us fucking breathalyzers.  Just to get us in trouble with the school too.  We all failed & then the Principal informed us that we were suspended in, like, 3 different ways…2 days out, varying days in.  Then for some reason we were told to go tell all of the teachers whose classes we were supposed to be in at the time.  I think that was just for the adults entertainment.  Either way it backfired because it gave us all the opportunity to show our friends that we really were drunk, therefore lending credibility to the rumors that would fly.  I have to admit that being able to brag that I came to school drunk & got a breathalyzer & then suspended did give me a little bit of a bad ass quality.  Then I went back home & probably fought with my mom for awhile before passing out.

So that’s my first real drinking story.  Unfortunately I can’t remember what my parents did to punish me, and my mom isn’t here to help me out.  Back then I never thought it would be a cherished memory…I felt like my life was over.  But I can only smile now, and be glad it’s part of my memory lane.  Do you have any stories from being a teenager?? 

What the shit happened to In Session????

I am beyond puzzled and more than a little pissed that In Session has been reduced from an all day buffet of true crime glory to TWO MOTHERFUCKING HOURS!!! What. The. Fuck.

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Not the later mentioned newbie.

I am an avid In Session watcher (until 3pm when they start showing that dumb bullshit about people being so idiotic they are chased by the police & blow themselves up) and even when I can’t straight up watch it all day I’ll flip over there during commercials on the kids channels. I was tuning into the Jodi Arias trial until one day I went to TruTV and they’re playing some jenky, fake as all hell court show reminiscent of Judge Judy. No warning (that I ever caught anyway), no explanation, just BOOM…”we’re changing your whole TV routine so fuck you.” For a true crime aficionado such as myself this is a bunch of bullshit. I realize this all first took place on March 4th & I’ve been meaning to bitch about it for awhile now.

The cast of In Session are like distant friends that won’t answer my calls…Vinnie with his pink shirts & super white toothpaste commercial grin; Beth with her transvestite voice (but man is she a stickler for details!); Jean with her obvious niceness even when thrust into a heated court room; and the newbie black guy (unable to steal find a pic) that gets on my nerves with his whiny voice but hey, he’s part of the package. How am I supposed to keep in touch with them if I’m reduced to 2 hours a day?! It’s like a friggin’ prison!! How am I going to get all the nitty-gritty details of these cases without spending hours on Google digging them up myself? What was the reason for this??!? And is the alternative any better?? Are you happy now, enjoyment ruiners and show lineup decision makers?? Now we’re stuck watching this dumbass fake court room bullshit and I guarantee your daytime ratings will go down, if only from my secret armchair detective army refusing to watch. So there.

What are y’all’s thoughts?? Any In Session fans out there? Maybe I’m just an outdated hag. Hhmmm.

Update: I’m kind of pissed that I spent some time finding & stealing downloading pictures of Vinnie, Beth & Jean then put them in the post but now for some reason it’s giving me an error & refusing to put them in. I’m not blog savvy enough to figure it out. Plus I’m not on a computer. It’s probably a conspiracy because I’m being so vocal about my hatred of the new lineup.

Update #2~ So I’m obviously very bothered by this change. I mean, In Session was the last remnants of Court TV, which is where this truTV mess originated from to begin with. Does the phrase “If it ain’t broke don’t fix it!” not mean anything to these assholes?? Apparently not. I looked up contact info for Turner Broadcasting (owned by Time Warner), who made the decision to cut 3/4 of In Session. They don’t have an email (of course…that’d be too easy & why would they want to be accessible to the public they claim to care so much about anyway?) but I did jot down their address & phone number, in case anyone else is as irate as I am and wanted to let them know.
Turner Broadcasting, One CNN Center, Atlanta Georgia 30303; (404) 827-1700

I also visited truTV’s website & they do have an email contact option however you have to choose from a list of shows, which In Session was not included (fishy). So I selected “other shows” & am providing the link in case anyone besides myself would like to let them know how pissed off they are.

Tell those bastards how you feel, Armchair Detective Army!

There went Peter Cottontail, half-assing it down the bunny trail….

Easter has come and gone, and I’m relieved.  When the hell did Easter turn into a spring Christmas extravaganza??  I don’t know if it was my dread of having to spend money or the ever continuing after effects of losing my mom or just plain laziness but I could not get in the holiday spirit this year.  Sure we made some homemade Pinterest crafts to decorate with a little but we didn’t even bother getting our other decorations out.  We didn’t even get the kids’ baskets out of the closet until “Easter eve”!

When I was a kid our Easter tradition was to go to my nanny’s, along with my aunt, uncle & 2 cousins.  I remember it being so cozy & exciting & fun…all of us getting together, catching up, dyeing eggs, watching TV, the kids being silly, squeezing in quality time with my nanny…the feelings & smells (eggs boiling, Easter dinner prep, my nanny’s house) & memories I have are hard to put into words.  Family time.  Togetherness.  Relaxation.  I loved it and now I miss it so so much.  First, in 2008, my nanny died.  And it felt like that threw so many things into chaos, including holiday traditions.  What do we do now?  Since my husband, kids & I had moved in to help care for her, we were still living in her house.  So our first Thanksgiving without her consisted of us & my mom at this huge dining room table where countless Easter & Thanksgiving dinners had held court.  It was completely different yet eerie remnants of familiarity remained.  Then, we didn’t even get another Easter with my mom because she passed away the following February.  It rocked my world & still does to this day.

I had thought maybe my aunt would take over the family get together responsibilities but she didn’t, except for once when we had it at her house because we were staying there for awhile.  Essentially, after losing my nanny & mom, the responsibility fell to me.  Which I have mixed feelings about…on one hand I love it because I’m a control freak & it makes me feel special to reign our family in and force quality togetherness down their gullets.  But on the other hand…I constantly question if I’m doing things the right way (aka the way it’s always been done in our family), I question choices that my mom would’ve made, and I miss them & the old traditions so terribly bad it gives me a lump in my throat.  I feel like a total let down in the Holiday Manager department, yet just like the whole birth right storyline in the Lion King it’s as if it’s fallen to me to do it.

This post was totally depressing.  And I can’t decipher an actual point.  It’s more of a deluge of words & feelings.  Thanks for listening.

As your reward, here are some Easter pictures of my amazing family.  Hope you & yours had a good holiday!

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Working on Easter cards for Great Grandma.
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Pinterest craft experiment #1

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Let them dry, pop balloon.
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End up with candy magically inside!
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My kids & nephew working on Pinterest craft #2.

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Wa-la! Stained glass decorations.
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Pinterest craft #3/childhood church craft: hollowed eggs.

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Why yes, that IS my husband's sexy arm. Rawr. 😉

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And yes...I *did* make a blood of christ egg. I had to.
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Unfortunately I didn't write it to be very readable.

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I am obsessed with taking pics of easter eggs. I apologize for the overload.

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Only at our house. Happy Easter!!

PS~  We had my sister & her family (husband & 2 kids) over for egg dyeing & easter dinner, I was just so busy I didn’t get a chance to take any pics.  Boo!  But that is our new tradition, 2 (maybe 3??) years running & I’m so grateful for it.

There’s nothing better than family.